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	<title>Steven James Dixon</title>
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	<link>http://stevenjamesdixon.com</link>
	<description>The RelationshipBeast</description>
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		<title>The Relationship Report &#8211; &#8220;Love Capacity&#8221;</title>
		<link>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/the-relationship-report-love-capacity</link>
		<comments>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/the-relationship-report-love-capacity#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 14 Feb 2012 05:06:16 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Steven James Dixon</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[The Relationship Report]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stevenjamesdixon.com/?p=1706</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Steven James Dixon created a fun and now popular way to determine your own capacity to love. It is called the Love Capacity Quiz. Steven developed the short quiz based on his belief that the average woman has a greater and deeper capacity to love then the average man does. Steven created the quiz with ]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/TRR_021220121.png"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-1707" title="TRR_02122012" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/TRR_021220121-300x257.png" alt="" width="300" height="257" /></a></p>
<p>Steven James Dixon created a fun and now popular way to determine your own capacity to love. It is called the Love Capacity Quiz. Steven developed the short quiz based on his belief that the average woman has a greater and deeper capacity to love then the average man does. Steven created the quiz with the control in mind that we want women who have not been damaged from relationship disappointment to score a “10” on the quiz. Steven wants men who have not been damaged from relationship disappointment to score at least a “7” on the quiz. It became clear pretty quickly that the average woman and the average man have both suffered through some major disappointments. Early quiz results have shown that the “Love Capacity” of the average woman is in the 6-7 range. The “Love Capacity” of the average man is in the 4-5 range. Our relationships and marriages are in trouble.</p>
<p><strong>Websters definition of</strong><strong> </strong><em><strong>love</strong></em><strong>:</strong></p>
<p><span style="color: #ff0000;"><strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">Love</span></strong> </span>– a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.</p>
<p><strong>Websters definition of capacity:</strong></p>
<p><span style="color: #ff0000;"> <strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">Capacit</span></strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">y</span></span> – the ability to receive or contain</p>
<p><strong>Steven James Dixon’s definition of Love Capacity:</strong></p>
<p><span style="color: #ff0000;"><strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">Love Capacity</span></strong></span> – a score given to an individual based on their ability to responsibly receive and give unconditional, forgiving, profoundly tender, passionate affection to another person.</p>
<p align="center"><span style="text-decoration: underline; color: #ff0000;"><strong>Checkout this fun video that Steven created to explain Love Capacity.</strong></span></p>
<p><strong> </strong><iframe src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/_F6R7Swb10g" frameborder="0" width="560" height="315"></iframe></p>
<p><strong>“Love Capacity”</strong> is a book about saving relationships and marriages. The purpose of the book is to teach those who have been hurt how to heal so that they can increase their capacity to love or to love again. The book is based on the research and data analysis of the results of the Love Capacity Quiz. You can take your <a title="The Love Capacity Quiz" href="http://www.lovecapacity.com/the-love-capacity-quiz">Love Capacity Quiz </a>and retrieve your Love Capacity Score on <a href="http://www.LoveCapacity.com">LoveCapacity.com</a> but the explanation and answers to the quiz will only be found in the Love Capacity book. Quiz data as in the average Love Capacity Score of <em>men over the age of 26</em> will only be shared through email with those of you who are registered for “The Relationship Report” mailing list. Quiz results will be broken down by gender, relationship status and age. Ok so take the quiz, tell a friend to take the quiz and register for the mailing list on <a href="http://www.LoveCapacity.com">LoveCapacity.com</a>.</p>
<p><strong>*It is especially important that each of us reach out directly to men and have them take the quiz.*</strong></p>
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		<title>The Relationship Report – “The State of Manhood in America” – Part II</title>
		<link>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/the-relationship-report-%e2%80%93-%e2%80%9cthe-state-of-manhood-in-america%e2%80%9d-%e2%80%93-part-ii</link>
		<comments>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/the-relationship-report-%e2%80%93-%e2%80%9cthe-state-of-manhood-in-america%e2%80%9d-%e2%80%93-part-ii#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 11 Jan 2012 19:56:13 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Steven James Dixon</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[The Relationship Report]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stevenjamesdixon.com/?p=1639</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[In Part I of “The State of Manhood In America” there was a statement that I made that I want to back up and break down: “I believe that manhood is defined by how you love and provide for your wife and family.” Many of the single men that I talked to did not like ]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/TRR_011912.png"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-1657" title="TRR_011912" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/TRR_011912.png" alt="" width="300" height="171" /></a>In Part I of <a href="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/the-relationship-report-the-state-of-manhood-in-america-part-i">“The State of Manhood In America”</a><strong> </strong>there was a statement that I made that I want to back up and break down:</p>
<p><strong><em>“I believe that manhood is defined by how you love and provide for your wife and family.”</em></strong><strong></strong></p>
<p>Many of the single men that I talked to did not like this definition of manhood. Many single men said to me <em>“Manhood has nothing to do with whether or not I am married or single.” </em>Then I would say <em>“But when are you the most man? Manhood should be about the state at which you are the most man that you can be. Your full evolution of man.”</em> This is the redefinition of manhood. Are there some single men that are more man then married men? – <em>Sure.</em> Can a man max his evolution while still in a state of singleness? – <em>I don’t see why not. </em>But what I am saying is that the average man that wants a marriage and family has to challenge himself. He has to challenge himself to meet the demands of the growth and development required, in specific areas, to have that successful marriage and happy family life. Those specific areas begin with but are not limited to: 1.) The Act of Loving 2.) Leadership 3.) Responsibility 4.) Communication 5.) Compromise 6.) Consistency 7.) Purpose 8.) Restraint 9.) Structure 10.) Planning.</p>
<p><strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">Specified Areas By Example: </span></strong></p>
<p>1.) I adopted an understanding that loving her is loving me.</p>
<p>2.) She is not going follow first, man has to exhibit leadership first.</p>
<p>3.) The single man is responsible for one person. The married man is responsible for at least two.</p>
<p>4.) Communication is on the job training. As a husband I had to develop better listening skills.</p>
<p>5.) I almost never compromised as a single man. Compromise is the first thing that I do when I wake up in the morning now.</p>
<p>6.) I had no reason to be consistent as a single man. As a married man consistency is oooh so key to my ability to lead.</p>
<p>7.) As a single man my purpose in life was to make money. As a married man my purpose in life is to provide.</p>
<p>8.) As a single man I did not have anything that I would categorize as a restraint. As a married man I practice restraint on a daily basis.</p>
<p>9.) As a single man structure was not necessary. I could make decisions on the fly that did not have any impact on anyone else. As a married man life is too complicated to not have structure.</p>
<p>10.) Similar to structure, planning became more necessary as I have to now plan for more than just me.</p>
<h1></h1>
<p><iframe src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/YUwa_-4tuDQ" frameborder="0" width="560" height="315"></iframe></p>
<h1 style="text-align: center;">- With @JacqueReid -</h1>
<p>1985 – A trend is taking place. Fatherless homes / single mothers. The ripple effect of the dissolution of marriage. A male first becomes a man, then he becomes a husband and then he becomes a father. In that order. You are man before and it is not necessary for you to ever be a husband or father. But manhood is not about your ability to be physically a man. Oftentimes we forget that manhood is a combination of two words. “Man” and “Hood”. “Man” is a physical being. Checkout one of Webster’s dictionary meaning of the word hood:</p>
<p><strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">Hood &#8211; </span></strong>a native English suffix denoting state, condition, character, nature, etc., or a body of persons of a particular character or class.</p>
<p><em>I am not even going to expound on that, I’m just going to let that marinate.</em></p>
<p>1987 – August 6, 9:00 PM. Thursday. After my 13<sup>th</sup> birthday party I told my Step-Father that if he wants to fight my mother going forward, he would have to fight me first. (I was more man at the age of 13 then most men are at the age of . . . well, the age that they are right now.)</p>
<p>2013 – In the future, I will still be old school. I need y’all to buy a couple more books so my wife doesn’t have to work. My goal is to require less and less of the money that she makes every day. Furthermore, I will never let her success negatively impact my manhood because my manhood is not defined by the money that she nor I make. DRUMROLL PLEASE . . . the redefinition of manhood:</p>
<p><strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">Manhood</span></strong> – The recognition by man that he is the foundation of the family. The belief by man that he is blessed with the intestinal fortitude to carry his family on his back. The understanding by man that through his leadership and guidance that his family can overcome all obstacles. Man is tough. Man is solid. Man is smart. Man knows what he doesn’t know. Man can adjust. Man is focused. Man loves. Man provides. *Most importantly* man knows that his family is depending on him to exhibit a profound manhood.</p>
<p>I submit to you today that manhood has never been based on money. If you chose a good woman, if you chose a good woman, if you chose a good woman, then she doesn’t love your money, she loves you. Love is an action that can be displayed in many different forms. Let’s say that spending your money on your woman is a form of love. Then I would say that spending your time on her is a greater form of love. Then I would say that sacrificing for her is a greater form of love. Then I would say that showing her that you care about her is a greater form of love. Then I would say that being faithful to her is a greater form of love. Then I would say that letting her know that you appreciate her is a greater form of love. Then I would say that compromise is a greater form of love. Then I would say that fighting for your marriage or relationship is a greater form of love. Shoot, loving her is a greater form of love than spending money on her. For all those men who don’t know what loving her is, re-read these last six lines. <em>THAT IS LOVING HER!</em></p>
<p><a href="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/the-relationship-report-the-state-of-manhood-in-america-part-i">To read Part I of “The State of Manhood In America” click here!</a></p>
<p>I need my own TV Show.</p>
<p>I need my own Radio Show.</p>
<p>And a column.</p>
<p>I go hard like this all day. #AskAboutMe</p>
<p><span style="color: #ff0000;"><strong>I AM THE RELATIONSHIPBEAST.</strong></span></p>
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		<title>The Relationship Report &#8211; &#8220;The State of Manhood in America&#8221; &#8211; Part I</title>
		<link>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/the-relationship-report-the-state-of-manhood-in-america-part-i</link>
		<comments>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/the-relationship-report-the-state-of-manhood-in-america-part-i#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 11 Jan 2012 18:52:55 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Steven James Dixon</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[The Relationship Report]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stevenjamesdixon.com/?p=1626</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The State of Manhood in America is at an all time low. This article is going to redefine manhood for men. Nearly every day you can find me on Facebook @StevenJamesDixon or Twitter @StevenJDixon trying to explain to men what manhood used to be, what it should be or what it can be again. 1960 ]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/TRR_0117121.png"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-1654" title="TRR_011712" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/TRR_0117121.png" alt="" width="300" height="171" /></a>The State of Manhood in America is at an all time low. This article is going to redefine manhood for men. Nearly every day you can find me on Facebook @StevenJamesDixon or Twitter @StevenJDixon trying to explain to men what manhood used to be, what it should be or what it can be again.</p>
<p>1960 &#8211; Many of the husbands during this time did not want their wives to work. It was a status symbol. The wife did not work because the man made a bunch of money. Man provided. He was the family’s only source of income. He could beat his chest. Everyone could see that he was <strong><em>the man</em></strong> because his wife didn’t have to work. If a new house was purchased, the man would get the credit. New car, man did that. New furniture, man did that too. Vacation? “<em>Oooh gurl, you got a good man!”</em> In the early part of the Sixties, accolades for men who provided for their families poured in by the ship load. With the male ego being affectionately stroked, man’s manhood remained fully intact. Intact until manhood ran into an <em>Army of Independent Women</em>. So I pulled together a group of young ladies over the age of 50 who were Army brats. I asked these women a simple but thought provoking question:  <em>“What was the catalyst that started the deterioration of manhood?”</em> After some deliberation the ladies decided that the man changed when the woman started making more money.</p>
<p>1963 &#8211; The “Equal Pay For Women Act” was passed. The “Equal Pay For Women Act” positively impacted money but negatively impacted marriage. On the day that the woman started being able to pay the bills, on that day, the male ego started missing hugs. Manhood took a hit. The man felt like he was less of a man because the woman was obviously more woman. She now had more to offer. Up until 1963 women were pretty much only frying bacon but after 1963 women started bringing home the bacon. If I could go back in time, to 1963, I would add an amendment to the “Equal Pay For Women Act.” The amendment would read like this:</p>
<p>“Man can fry bacon. It’s ok. Bacon is not sexist.”</p>
<h1 style="text-align: center;">&#8220;The State of Manhood in America.&#8221;</h1>
<p><iframe src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/I0GFeOQZ950" frameborder="0" width="560" height="315"></iframe></p>
<p>As she grew, he became smaller . . . <em>not to her, but to him</em>. As she evolved, he became lost. Lost in his own perception of himself. His perception was that she did not need him as much as she used to. His perception was that the only thing that he brought to the table was money. The money that she no longer needed defined his manhood. Henceforth man decided that he did not need to work as hard or provide as much as he once did for woman. She is an equal now. And you know what, she can provide for me!</p>
<p>1970 &#8211; During the 70’s the now “desegregated” black man was going through the phenomenon known as <em>“The Man Holding A Brother Down.” </em>So now it became that wives had to work because husbands couldn’t find a job. Women could find jobs. They could be maids, teachers, nurses or something along those professions. The black man had to be highly skilled to maintain a job during the 70’s.</p>
<p>1973 &#8211; My father lost his job. With no money coming in he lost his transportation. With no transportation he could not find another job.</p>
<p>1974 &#8211; My father unsuccessfully tries to rob a gas station as a means to provide. When I was born, he was in prison. I have never met him. No one in our family knows where he is, including his mother, my grandmother. My father is still alive . . . somewhere. (Scientists have been unsuccessful in proving that manhood is a gene that is passed on genetically. Manhood is not a part of a man’s D.N.A. but rather his mindset.)</p>
<p>1975 – The working woman was in full swing. When the woman left for work each day a piece of his manhood left the house every day too. It was very common for one of two things to happen during this time period:</p>
<p><strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">1. Wife was working</span></strong>. Husband felt less pressure and relaxed. Stopped working as hard. Stopped progressing on the job. Lost his motivation to out work the next guy because the next guy’s wife was working also. With everyone’s wives working, there was no measurement of success . . . to the man.</p>
<p><strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">2. Wife was working.</span></strong> Man is looking. He can’t find anything. He becomes frustrated. Many, many, many women talked to me about abusive husbands from 1975 – 1985. Woman became stronger. Man felt weaker. Man could no longer control a woman with a job and her own money. In an effort to control her, he abused her.</p>
<p>Now of course there were some excellent God-fearing, wife-loving, family-providing men ALL throughout history. Those of you who did not bear witness to what I am talking about here are blessed. Before you start disagreeing with me, go do your own research. Talk to a woman over 50. I believe that manhood is defined by how you love and provide for your wife and family. So I wanted the woman’s viewpoint. The woman’s grade of the man per se.  From her point of view…WHAT . . . WENT . . . WRONG??? Take this article for whatever you feel it is worth. Whatever percentage that you are comfortable with believing in is fine by me. The bottom line is that “The State of Manhood In America” is at an all time low and we have to get to the root of the problem. This is my effort to get to that root, pull that root and plant new seeds. In Part II of “The State of Manhood In America” I am going to unveil a new definition for manhood.</p>
<p><span style="color: #ff0000;"><strong> I AM THE RELATIONSHIPBEAST.</strong></span></p>
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		<title>5 Things We Can Do Better in Relationships in 2012</title>
		<link>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/5-things-we-can-do-better-in-relationships-in-2012</link>
		<comments>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/5-things-we-can-do-better-in-relationships-in-2012#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 09 Jan 2012 20:59:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Steven James Dixon</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Articles For Dating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[feature]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stevenjamesdixon.com/?p=1612</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Relationships were jacked up in 2011. The way in which man and woman relate in 2012 can only get better right? Right? Anyone with me? Can I get an AMEN? “5 Things That We Can Do Better In Relationships In 2012”: 5. Get Out of Your Bad Relationship &#8211; *New Rule Alert* &#8211; If your ]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/Relationship_Pictures_2012.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-1615" title="Relationship_Pictures_2012" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/Relationship_Pictures_2012-300x200.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="200" /></a>Relationships were jacked up in 2011. The way in which man and woman relate in 2012 can only get better right? Right? Anyone with me? Can I get an AMEN? “5 Things That We Can Do Better In Relationships In 2012”:</p>
<p><strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">5. Get Out of Your Bad Relationship</span></strong> &#8211; *New Rule Alert* &#8211; If your relationship needs counseling and you are not married don’t get married to that person. We need to have higher standards for getting married and even greater standards on getting a divorce.</p>
<p>*New Rule Alert* &#8211; Divorce is not an option but if your spouse refuses to go to counseling, divorce them. Every married couple needs to have a counselor on speed dial. If you are in a bad marriage it is not going to get better on accident, get some help or get out! If your spouse won’t go to counseling here is what you do: Go to counseling by yourself. Each time after counseling go home and give your spouse a summary of the counseling session that you just left. After your spouse hears you say, “The counselor asked me . . . <em>what was I thinking when I married you?</em>” OR “The counselor said that <em>ALL OF THE PROBLEMS IN OUR MARRIAGE ARE YOUR FAULT!” </em>After your spouse gets an ear full of that for three weeks in a row either he or she will file the divorce papers themselves or they will go to counseling to defend themselves. In 2012 will have to end these bad relationships.</p>
<p><strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">4. Forgive &amp; Heal</span></strong> &#8211; After getting out of your bad relationship sit down somewhere. Don’t date for a while. Work on you. Your first item of business is to forgive the people related to all of your bad relationship experiences. You cannot carry anger, frustration, disappointment or resentment into your next relationship. If you cannot forgive, relationships are not for you because without forgiveness healing does not take place. Healing is the process of filling the holes in your heart. If your heart has holes in it, don’t nobody want dat raggedy heart.  In 2012 get your heart right before trying to offer it to some one else.</p>
<p><strong>3. Date Smarter This Time</strong> – Initially dating is a process of elimination. Once you have eliminated the thugs and skrippers dating becomes a process of selection. Date on your level. 90% of women want to date the top 10% of men. The numbers don’t add up because the top 10% of men want to date the top 10% of women. Don’t expect anything that you can’t give. Opposites attract on <em>Fantasy Island</em> but in reality it is very difficult to compromise with a person that has a different belief system than you do. You know your flaws. Worry about those instead of theirs. Accept the fact that both <em>nobody</em> is perfect and that includes <em>you</em>. With the knowledge of your own imperfections, it should make it easier to accept the imperfections of someone else. In 2012 the key to relationships will be knowing what you can accept and live with and what you can’t.</p>
<p>*Note to men – we have to stop putting women in the top ten percentile based on looks alone.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h1 style="text-align: center;">Listen to Steven&#8217;s interview on this article with Twanda Black of Kiss 104 Atlanta.</h1>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://youtu.be/CFdQMpdkNL4"><img class="size-large wp-image-1613 aligncenter" title="SJD - KISS 104" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/SJD-KISS-104-1024x576.jpg" alt="" width="524" height="295" /></a></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">2. Define What You Want Out of A Relationship</span></strong> – More and more people are shaping their relationships based on something that they saw or read by some supposed relationship expert. Stop listening to them unless it’s me. If you just want sex then you can skip this tip. If he wants sex and you want more he does not have more to give you. You just met, she wants a relationship, that’s not going to work. “Open Marriages” are stupid. You don’t have to have a threesome. Husbands can be faithful and wives can be submissive but each person has to clearly define what they want out of a relationship before they are in a relationship. This definition should not change based on the person. You should approach a relationship in the same fashion that you approach a job. It is called a “Job Search” for a reason. You are looking for the perfect fit. A job that you enjoy, that has benefits, where you receive appreciation for you work. Know that you need the same stuff out of a relationship. Our goal for 2012 is to have a more effective “Relationship Search.”</p>
<p><strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">1. Respect OPP</span></strong> – Ok, men are cheating at an alarming rate. Men have been cheating for years but the difference is that in years past it was the men who were pursuing these affairs. Now-a-days women aren’t even ashamed of sleeping with married men. And women, I can’t get an accurate count on how many of y’all are cheating because y’all are too sneaky. There are millions of single people. In 2012 let’s try to leave the married people alone. Let’s respect other’s people’s property. How would you feel if your husband was sleeping with someone else? How would you feel if your wife was sleeping with someone else? Is it so difficult for you to put yourself in someone else’s shoes? Do you count the lives that you destroy when you take a spouse from their family? Do you care about other people? If we can do one thing better in relationships in 2012 please let it be that we are going to respect other people’s property.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h1>Follow me on Twitter: <a href="http://www.twitter.com/StevenJDixon">@StevenJDixon</a></h1>
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		<title>Why Men Have To Go To Church</title>
		<link>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/why-men-have-to-go-to-church</link>
		<comments>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/why-men-have-to-go-to-church#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 02 Dec 2011 15:51:22 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Steven James Dixon</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Articles For Men]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[feature]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stevenjamesdixon.com/?p=1585</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Men have to learn what love is before we can feel it or provide it. Too many fathers never learned what love was so they couldn’t teach their sons about love. Since fathers are not teaching sons about love, then love has to be taught from the Source. The Source of love is God. I ]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/CHURCH_Blackman.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-1586" title="CHURCH_Blackman" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/CHURCH_Blackman-300x171.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="171" /></a>Men have to learn what love is before we can feel it or provide it. Too many fathers never learned what love was so they couldn’t teach their sons about love. Since fathers are not teaching sons about love, then love has to be taught from the Source. The Source of love is God. I learned in church one Sunday that the only true love is agape. Agape is God’s love. Agape is described as a selfless love felt by Christians for their fellow human beings. In order to love some one else, you must first love Christ. You can only love other Christians through your love for Christ. Men have to go to church to learn about love. There is no better place to learn about love than the Christian Church.</p>
<p>It is important that men learn about love at the church so that they can appropriately spread that love throughout their family at their homes. One of the major problems that we face in marriage &amp; family today is that love and the focus of love is often times being misplaced. We have too many husbands that love their mothers more than they love their wives. We have too many husbands that love their children more than they love their wives. We have too many husbands that are in love with too many other things. <em>“I love hanging out with my homeboys watching the game. I love my job. I love my business. I love my money.”</em></p>
<p>I am here to tell you today that I don’t love anything else until my wife is full of my love. All of my love is reserved for her and the world (my son, my mother, my stuff, my things) receives only the love that is left over. My pastor instructs us to “GIVE ALL TO YOUR SPOUSE.” God gives us all. God gives us all to give all to our spouses. It is us who decides that our spouses don’t deserve all. To those who have made this decision to not give all, I am also here to tell you that this decision is not yours to make. God gives all. God does not decide on a case by case basis who gets all. Every one gets all, all the time. A husband should never decide not to give his all to his wife. A husband should never decide not to give all that God has given him to give his wife. This is why men have to go to church. This is why men have to learn what love is. This is why men have to learn how to love because we have to learn to give our spouses . . . all.</p>
<p>Our purpose here on earth is to grow closer to God until we join him in heaven. You can’t grow closer to God while playing<a href="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/RB_ADD.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-1381 alignright" title="RB_ADD" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/RB_ADD-300x272.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="272" /></a> X-Box with your homeboy. Money, jobs and business will never get you into heaven. Not saying that a man can’t have or do other activities, I am just saying to prioritize and love your wife. Give your wife all that you have. Give your marriage all that you have. Divorce is not an option especially when kids are involved. We have to keep our families together. I am here to save marriages. GET IN THAT CHURCH HOUSE SO YOU CAN LEARN HOW TO LOVE YOUR WIFE!!! (An e-offering plate is being sent to your email box as you read this article.)</p>
<p>Most men, me included, need some type of measuring stick of exactly how to or how much to love our wives. Your baby girl, your son or your mother can be used as your measuring stick. If you don&#8217;t love your wife more than you love all other people in your life you are out of accordance with God&#8217;s word. The wife is #1. That is where you have to start. Once I started thinking like that, I challenged myself daily. I asked myself, &#8220;How can I love my wife more?&#8221; Every day, how can I love more, how can I love more, how can I love more and I figured it out. It starts with me.</p>
<p>All relationships and marriages are either successful or they fail based solely on the leadership of the man. It does not matter what the woman is or was doing wrong. If the man takes on the marriage as his responsibility . . . if the man stops pointing the finger . . . if the man can be a consistent lover of God . . . if the man can make the woman feel loved . . . the woman will naturally fall in line. YOU CANNOT TELL THAT WOMAN TO GET IN LINE!  You have to show her that you are already in line, you got to be in line already. She will be watching you. After you have been in line for awhile she will join you.</p>
<p>Men, don&#8217;t go to just any old church. Find a church that you enjoy and a Pastor that you respect. Chose your church like you choose your wife. Ephesians 5:25-27 says that husbands should love their wives as Christ loved the church.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h1>Follow me on Twitter: <a href="http://www.Twitter.com/StevenJDixon">@StevenJDixon</a></h1>
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		<title>The Relationship Report &#8220;Check Your Male&#8221;</title>
		<link>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/check-your-male</link>
		<comments>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/check-your-male#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 30 Nov 2011 01:52:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Steven James Dixon</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[The Relationship Report]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stevenjamesdixon.com/?p=1547</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[ Much too often I talk to males who have no idea what being a man is about. Too many males have never had a man in their life to learn from or compare themselves to. My wife and I were at dinner the other day and we were laughing about how competitive my five year ]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/TRR_1129111.png"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-1659" title="TRR_112911" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/TRR_1129111-300x171.png" alt="" width="300" height="171" /></a> Much too often I talk to males who have no idea what being a man is about. Too many males have never had a man in their life to learn from or compare themselves to. My wife and I were at dinner the other day and we were laughing about how competitive my five year old son is with his father. We were laughing until it dawned on us that this competition between father and son is the beginnings of the construction of <strong><em>his</em></strong> man. My son and I compete on everything. Who runs the fastest, who can bring mommy a snack that she likes, who is the strongest and toughest, who mommy loves the most, who can win the basketball game, who gets a kiss from mommy first. The competitions that we have are learning opportunities for my son. My son is going to learn more from me indirectly than he ever will learn from me directly. For the grown boys out there who have yet to become men, here are two things to look for when you <em>“Check Your Male.”</em></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><iframe src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/5wEtWe-SARo" frameborder="0" width="560" height="315"></iframe></p>
<p><strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">1. Love Your Family</span></strong></p>
<p>My wife is my rib. My son is my seed. The keyword in those statements is “MY”. I love “MY” family. I live for them. Nothing outside of them comes close to them. They come first at all times. There is no competition because they are “MY” family. When I say &#8220;MY&#8221; I don&#8217;t mean &#8220;MY&#8221; as in possession. I mean &#8220;MY&#8221; as in protection. They don’t know it but they live in a bubble. Secure. RIGHT NOW I am writing this article in the bushes across the street from my son’s daycare. RIGHT NOW I am writing this article from the 17<sup>th</sup> floor of the office building that is <strong><em>*catta-cornered </em></strong>to my wife’s place of employment. Scope. Strapped. Loaded. Watching &amp; writing. Writing &amp; watching. <span style="color: #ff0000;"><strong><em>Hold up</em></strong></span> . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . <span style="color: #0000ff;"><strong><em>ok, I am back</em></strong></span>. There was a disagreement a couple cubes down from my wife. I will wipe out everyone if necessary. All men should feel like this about their families. My son is learning from me how to love a woman. My son is learning from me that loving a woman is cool. My son is learning from me that loving a woman is not something to be ashamed of. You chose her (wife). You made them (kids). What is wrong with you if you don’t love them? <em>Do you love yourself?</em></p>
<p><strong><em>*catta-cornered</em></strong> – Note to my editors. I wanted to spell catta-corned just like that. It sounds right and it’s funny. Leave it alone!<a href="http://itunes.apple.com/us/album/men-dont-heal-we-ho-a-book/id415715171"><img class="alignright size-medium wp-image-896" title="Buy Now CD" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/Buy-Now-CD1-300x184.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="184" /></a></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">2. Provide For Your Family</span></strong></p>
<p>The next thing that my son will learn from me is that daddy provides. He does not understand the value of money but he does know that daddy got it. <strong><em>That daddy gets it!</em></strong> That daddy is perfectly fine with giving it to mommy. That daddy is perfectly fine with spending it all on him. My son is going to learn that a man provides for his family.</p>
<p>I was counseling a couple the other day and the wife had a stank attitude. Normal. She had a legitimate complaint about the financial stability of the husband. Dude was bad with the money. I am not a financial guy but I figured that I would talk to dude about money. The first thing that I said to him was, “Why is your wife worried about money?” He made some excuses I ignored them. I said to him that in no uncertain terms is your wife supposed to be worried about how the household bills are going to get paid. I did not say that a woman should not pay bills or that a man should pay all the bills. I am not talking about a shopping or entertainment budget. I am talking about the mortgage, the rent, the utilities, the car, the life insurance, THE BILLS!</p>
<p>Let me be clear. My wife and I have agreed upon a certain amount of money that she gives to the household to help pay bills each month. When she gives me that money, I guarantee her that all bills are to be paid. ALL. She need not worrying her pretty little self about when, what, how, howcome, who. ALL BILLS PAID. I AM MAN ALL DAY. This is what a man does. This is the purpose of man. If man does not provide, he is not a man, he is a male and he needs to check his male. I take a lot of pride in being a man. I take a lot of pride in being responsible for LaMechia LaChelle Dixon, my boo. Ethan Jacob Dixon looks up to me and I look out for him. My son thinks that I am a millionaire. Not because he has fancy toys, but because he has no worries. Daddy provides.</p>
<p>To the men who are incapable consistently paying the bills . . . let your woman cash your check. To the men who don’t have no check to cash, lay down in the street. (My apologies to the men who are diligently looking for employment. Having said that, I can’t think of an excusable reason that I would allow myself to have for not providing for my family. Daddy provides.) If you are not getting a check in the mail then you need to “Check Your Male.”</p>
<p>Loving your family and providing for your family merely graduates you from male to man. You are a man now, congrats! But you mustn’t become complacent.  I talk to too many men that have not maxed out on the talents that God has blessed them with. All of us have talents but many of us are lazy. It is within all of us to become great men and it is never too late to start being great. There are millions of males. There are a lot of men but there are very few great husbands. Every day I meet brilliant men who dedicate themselves to being the best lawyer or doctor or rapper or actor or athlete but there are not enough men that are dedicating themselves to being the best husband or father. If your focus is on something besides one of those two then you need to “Check Your Male.”</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h1>Follow me on Twitter: <a href="http://www.Twitter.com/StevenJDixon">@StevenJDixon</a></h1>
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		<title>Master&#8217;s Degree In Woman Management</title>
		<link>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/masters-degree-in-woman-management</link>
		<comments>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/masters-degree-in-woman-management#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 27 Sep 2011 20:33:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Steven James Dixon</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Articles For Men]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stevenjamesdixon.com/?p=1481</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[To be a man, you need the proper training and development. To be a husband, you must decide that being a man is not enough. To be in a successful relationship with a woman, a man must gain an advanced understanding. Here is that understanding: Elective Courses (required, though) Relationships 101: Fighting Your Woman Class ]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="mailto:StevenJamesDixon@RelationshipBeast.com" target="_blank"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-343" title="flirt" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/flirt-300x221.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="221" /></a>To be a man, you need the proper training and development. To be a husband, you must decide that being a man is not enough. To be in a successful relationship with a woman, a man must gain an advanced understanding. Here is that understanding:</p>
<p><strong>Elective Courses (required, though)</strong></p>
<p><strong>Relationships 101: Fighting Your Woman</strong><br />
Class Description: Any and all men, past, present and future, that put their hands on a woman are punks. Putting your hands on a woman is inexcusable. The only reason that a man would hit a woman is because that man is afraid of that woman.</p>
<p>If you are one of those men and you think that a woman can whip you in a fight, then I can see you striking first out of fear. You are scared. Otherwise, a man should have a certain swagger about himself when it comes to physical confrontation with a woman. Take me, for example. My swag won&#8217;t allow me to hit a woman because it would not be a fair fight. I have been struck by at least three different women during my Ho-ing days and not one time did I ever feel compelled or contemplate hitting any of them back. I have a supreme confidence that I would tear a woman limb from limb in a one-on-one fight. ALL MEN SHOULD FEEL THIS WAY. My wife would need her sister, her mother, my sister and mother and at least two friends for me to even consider the bout . . . and even then, they would have to catch me after a long day in the yard and off-guard sleeping to have a chance.</p>
<p><strong>201: Arguing With Your Woman</strong><br />
Class Description: &#8220;If your woman is always arguing with you, it&#8217;s because she thinks that you are a woman.&#8221; Think about it, men don&#8217;t argue with each other. If I have a problem with another man, we are not going to argue about the problem. He is going to run and hide or get smashed. So when arguments break out between man and woman, man is unprepared and untrained for this activity. Women love to argue, this is what they do. They argue with their family, friends, co-workers, whoever, whenever, wherever. You mustn&#8217;t let them pull you into this activity. When they argue with us we are immediately at a disadvantage. They will win the argument because we will run out of patience and become upset and there&#8217;s nothing that we can do about it.</p>
<p>We are not built for this interaction of emotional expression. Sit down, shut up and listen to your woman. She is going to tell you what the problem is. You just have to figure out how to solve it or at least meet her halfway. During your &#8220;Shut Up &amp; Listen Process&#8221; you are developing your resolution. As a man, when we speak, we have got to be saying something of meaning. We can&#8217;t just be talking. We can&#8217;t just be going back and forth with them. She says something and then we say something . . . that&#8217;s not manly.</p>
<p><strong>301: Disrespecting Your Woman</strong><br />
Class Description: Do you think that you are more of a man because you disrespected a woman? I have never called a woman the &#8220;B&#8221; word to her face. No need to. Why would I lower myself to where she already is, if that&#8217;s the case? I have never called a woman a &#8220;ho&#8221; <a href="mailto:StevenJamesDixon@RelationshipBeast.com"><br />
</a>to her face. I have never purposely embarrassed a woman. Never made a woman feel ashamed or feel bad in public on purpose. I have never tried to &#8220;show out&#8221; in front of her family or friends or my family or friends. I have never cussed out or loud-talked a woman in public. I don&#8217;t even cuss at women in private. Ladies, if your man cusses at you he does not respect you. Men if you cuss at your woman then you don&#8217;t respect yourself. You chose her. What men have to understand is that disrespecting a woman reflects badly on us.</p>
<p><strong>401: Loving Your Woman</strong><br />
Class Description: Many men don&#8217;t know what love is. Either we couldn&#8217;t feel it or we didn&#8217;t understand it<a href="mailto:StevenJamesDixon@RelationshipBeast.com"><img class="alignright size-medium wp-image-1381" title="RB_ADD" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/RB_ADD-300x272.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="272" /></a> or we couldn&#8217;t recognize or acknowledge it. Therefore many of us don&#8217;t know how to love until we have first lost love. Loving for men does not come as naturally as it does for women. Men, we have to work harder at loving our woman. Accept that. We have to actually try to love. We have to put forth a great effort to love. We have to want to love at a higher level. We have to make a decision, we have to make up our minds that we have to love our woman the absolute best we can. What I challenge men to do is think about that person you love the most  . . . and love your woman twice as much as you love that person. That&#8217;s right, love your woman twice as much as you love your mother, father, kids, granny or anyone or anything else. If you love the Dallas Cowboys or the Los Angeles Lakers then you must figure out how to love your woman twice as much as you love that stuff/junk. We have to show our women love and we have to tell our women that we love them. The first thing that men have to accept about loving their woman is that no one else compares, it&#8217;s not even close.</p>
<p><strong>501: Protecting Your Woman</strong><br />
Class Description: My woman has a force field around her called <a href="http://www.essence.com/topics/?s=Steven+James+Dixon">Steven James Dixon</a>. Nobody bet not touch her! As far as her protection is concerned, I am a combination of the Secret Service, S.W.A.T. (Steven Will Attack Threats to Lamechia) and King Kong. I protect my wife from all things including me. I try my best to never be the cause of her heartache or pain. Not only do I try my best to keep my wife out of harm&#8217;s way, I also try my best to keep disappointment, frustration and confusion at a five meter distance from my wife. So when my wife&#8217;s company downsized and she came home upset I met her at the door and said to her, &#8220;You need not worry Boo. Money and bills are not your concern. You are a Helper. I am responsible.&#8221; The buck stops here. I will have/devise/figure/execute a plan to save the day! I am the Problem Resolution Department.<br />
<strong><br />
&#8211; Classes Within Your Major &#8211;</strong></p>
<p><strong>621: &#8220;She Won&#8217;t Let Me Be A Man&#8221;</strong><br />
Class Description: I have never had this problem. A woman cannot take a man&#8217;s manhood, only he can give it away. What I hear when a man says this to me is, &#8220;I have done some things wrong in the past that have caused her disappointment and in the process she lost respect for me and I have not rectified the situation nor regained her respect. She does not respect my leadership because I failed her.&#8221; Being a man is knowing how to lead a woman. If you can&#8217;t lead then she can&#8217;t follow. (I will give leadership examples in the graduate level courses.) If she has to let you be the man then that means one of two things:  She is more woman than you are man or she is already the man and she does not need you to fill that role. Which also means that you are an old and outdated model and you will be replaced.</p>
<p><strong>721: &#8220;She&#8217;s Got A Stank Attitude&#8221;</strong><br />
Class Description: Many, many, many of today&#8217;s women have a stank attitude. I don&#8217;t want to put a number on it but I would say that the percentage is above 50%. I submit to men today that women are not born with a stank attitude. The woman&#8217;s attitude is stank because a man disappointed her. The stank attitude adjuster is LOVE. (Review Class 401 if necessary.) If you love a woman properly the stank will fade away.</p>
<p><strong>821 &#8220;She Is Too Independent&#8221;</strong><br />
Class Description: I was dating a woman one time and she had her own house, cars, money, etc. The first time that I went to her house I noticed that a widow was broken. I said to her:</p>
<p>MAN: &#8220;I am going to fix that window for you.&#8221;<br />
WOMAN: &#8220;Don&#8217;t be coming in here trying to takeover. I have a handyman that I can call and pay him to fix it. I don&#8217;t need you to feel like I am the type of woman that needs a man.&#8221;<br />
MAN: &#8220;I am going to fix the widow. OK.&#8221;<br />
WOMAN: &#8220;OK.&#8221;</p>
<p>Just like the stank attitude, independence is taught to women. Independence for women is not innate; it is a learned response to an inability to be dependent upon a man. If the man is consistently dependable, over time, the woman will gain trust and confidence in her man and naturally become less independent.</p>
<p><strong><a href="http://itunes.apple.com/us/album/men-dont-heal-we-ho-a-book/id415715171"><br />
</a><a href="http://itunes.apple.com/us/album/men-dont-heal-we-ho-a-book/id415715171"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-896" title="Buy Now CD" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/Buy-Now-CD1-300x184.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="184" /></a>921: &#8220;She Is Not Submissive&#8221;</strong><br />
Class Description: If you have to tell your woman to submit to you then you are doing something wrong. Submission is not something that you tell someone do. Submission is the act of a woman trusting the judgment (not necessarily better judgment, but trusting the judgment nevertheless) of the man. The woman is the sole decision maker in deciding if she is going to submit to the man. Therefore, if a man wants a woman to be submissive, he must first exhibit behavior that resembles good leadership skills and decision making abilities. As soon as the man starts to consistently exhibit these skills and behaviors the woman will again naturally begin the submission process. Men, understand that when a woman submits to you, she has the easy job. Submitting to you means that she is trusting you with directing the relationship. You have all the responsibility. The person with the responsibility has the harder job right? So if she is unwilling to do the easy job it means that she has no faith in you that you can complete the harder job.</p>
<p><strong>1021: &#8220;She Does Not Take Care of Me&#8221;</strong><br />
Class Description: You teach each other how to treat each other. If you take care of her, she is going to take care of you. If you don&#8217;t like the way that she is doing something then you need to show her how to do it by example. If you don&#8217;t like the way that she is loving you, love her better. If she doesn&#8217;t pay you enough attention, pay her more attention. Too often men are sitting around complaining instead of being proactive. Women are more skilled at complaining than we are. For every one complaint that we have, they have six. I believe that if men lead women by example that women will follow that example. Sometimes that example is to sacrifice first or to do more than our fair share of the workload. Eve was created from Adam&#8217;s rib. Taking care of her is taking care of him.</p>
<p><strong>&#8211; Graduate Level Course -</strong></p>
<p>University Principle: &#8220;All relationships are either successful or they fail based solely on the leadership of men.&#8221;</p>
<p>After completing a rigorous application process, entrance into the Graduate Program is contingent upon acceptance and agreement to the University Principle and successful completion of all classes listed above. A written referral from a Grown Woman will be required (Not yo Momma). This Graduate Program consists of one graduate level course. Not many are called. Hardly any are chosen. Many, many men will take years to pass this course. Many more men shall never pass this course.</p>
<p><strong>2011: &#8220;Being A Man&#8221;</strong><br />
Class Description: The key to understanding this course is that sometimes &#8220;Being A Man&#8221; is not fair but you can always be a transsexual if you require fairness in order to have a successful relationship.</p>
<p>During the wedding planning negotiation with my wonderful wife LaMechia I took an &#8216;L&#8217; one day. I lost a crucial battle. She said something I had no retort for. I was caught off guard. Blindsided. If it had been a war, I would have been a foot solider and she would have been unveiling the new TANK WEAPONTRY. Here I am thinking that we both got knives!  Even fight right? SHE GOT A TANK WEAPON! I AM LIKE WHAT IS THAT THING! I toss my knife at the heart of the tank and it bounces off. Rocks, stones, sticks &#8211; nothing impacts the tank. What had happened was . . .</p>
<p>Steven: I have set a budget for the wedding and we need to stick to that budget.<br />
LaMechia: But YOUR budget is not enough to plan what I want for MY wedding. You need to double up buddy.<br />
Steven: It is not your wedding, it is our wedding.<br />
LaMechia: Who told you that? They lied to you.<br />
Steven: Whatever. You are not being fair.<br />
Lamechia: I don&#8217;t have to be fair.<br />
Steven: Huh?</p>
<p>I looked around to see if anyone had heard what she said so that they could laugh too. But there was no one to share my laugh with. I blacked out for a minute and thought to myself as the statement registered . . . YOU DON&#8217;T HAVE TO BE FAIR? I snapped out of it, &#8220;I&#8217;m tripping,&#8221; I said to myself and I looked at her for a retraction. No retraction. Misunderstanding? No misunderstanding. It was my move. I had no move. You see, I thought that we were operating in fairness. I thought that we were working together to reach a common goal. I thought we were on the same team. I learned that day that we are not. They care about what they want. I learned that they don&#8217;t have rules, regulations, guidelines or procedures to follow when they want something. When they want something they want something and that&#8217;s it. It was then I learned that as men we have to manage ourselves properly in order to even have a shot at MASTERING WOMAN MANAGEMENT.</p>
<p>I said to my fiance, &#8220;I have set a budget based on our earnings and expenses. We can increase the budget to whatever it is that you want to spend but we will also have push out our wedding date.&#8221; I was firm but flexible. I didn&#8217;t let her sidetrack me, THEY TRY TO DO THAT!!! We compromised and had a destination wedding. We were able to compromise because of the respect she had for me as a man and the faith that she had in me that I was capable in leading our family in a positive direction. She was confident and comfortable in knowing that what I was telling her I had to give was the best that I could give. She trusted me. Relationships and marriages are failing because women have lost confidence in men. When women don&#8217;t have confidence in men, compromising is more difficult, nearly impossible. Women don&#8217;t respect men anymore. They don&#8217;t trust men. Why compromise with some one that you don&#8217;t respect or trust? MASTERING WOMAN MANAGEMENT is not about the woman. It is about Being A Man. Class dismissed.</p>
<p>–</p>
<p><a href="http://www.twitter.com/StevenJDixon">Twitter.com/StevenJDixon</a></p>
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<p>Don’t forget to register for the RelationshipBeast Mailing List.</p>
<p>–</p>
<h3>Other Articles That You Are Sure To Enjoy!</h3>
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		<title>Q and A with Bossip.com Part III</title>
		<link>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/q-and-a-with-bossip-com-part-iii</link>
		<comments>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/q-and-a-with-bossip-com-part-iii#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 19 Sep 2011 18:36:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Steven James Dixon</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Q & A with The Relationship Beast]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stevenjamesdixon.com/?p=1442</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Good day, Bossip fam! As promised, we are re-introducing you to Steven James Dixon, author of the book, “Men Don’t Heal We Ho,” a Book About the Emotional Instability of Men. After receiving and reading the book, we had to talk to him as we learned he had scripted his experiences with women and marriage ]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/Steven-Daper-32.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-1684" title="Steven Daper 3" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/Steven-Daper-32-300x171.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="171" /></a>Good day, Bossip fam! As promised, we are re-introducing you to<a href="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/Steven-Daper-5.jpg"><br />
</a> Steven James Dixon, author of the book, “Men Don’t Heal We Ho,” a Book About the Emotional Instability of Men. After receiving and reading the book, we had to talk to him as we learned he had scripted his experiences with women and marriage and sent it to the press. With chapters that will resonate in the depths of your psyche, Dixon leaves no room for question in this in-depth chronicle of his personal struggles with being a husband after unapologetically “ho”ing. His message is true and the best part, perhaps, is his willingness to share his thoughts and emotions with raw honesty. We had the chance to explore Dixon’s thought process and it’s reminiscent of long chats with an older brother who will never steer you in the wrong direction. No questions go unanswered without brutal candor that cannot be argued – it’s no wonder people would seek the ‘Relationship Beast’s’ opinion. It’s foolproof and simple enough to apply to your love life. Many topics are worthy of discussion, so, please take a look and share your thoughts below! To read the first part of our interview with Mr. Dixon, click here! For part 2, click here!</p>
<p>Bossip: So, let’s touch on the emotional instability of men that you talk about in you book.</p>
<p>Dixon: Some men, who are emotionally unstable, go into this zone where they’re not thinking, they’re not feeling and they’re not understanding how they’re impacting or affecting other people. They’re just acting. And that’s why some of us lose it or go crazy because we keep our issues to ourselves, you know? Women can go to their mothers, their sisters, friends and cry, vent, express themselves and feel better but men fee like they don’t have a platform for that. Not only do we not want to share, we also believe that our friends don’t want to hear it.</p>
<p>Bossip: Hm. That’s interesting. Now, in your book you talked about your father’s emotional instability which led to his resenting your mom, you and your siblings. What advice would you give to a man who’s feeling “trapped” or harboring resentment towards his wife, the mother of his children or his kids?</p>
<p>Dixon: It’s not manly. I don’t really know how to else to say that. There’s no sugar-coating this. A lot of men don’t understand the responsibility of being – well, for starters, a lot of men don’t know what a man is! As a man, his number one responsibility is his family, period. That is what a man is. A man is responsible for his family – protection, security, safety, stability, financially – all those types of things. My wife doesn’t worry about any of that at all and I wasn’t taught that! There was no one to teach me that. No one! My dad was in prison and my stepfather was crazy, there was no one around. It took me being blessed and saying to myself, “I have to figure this out.” It took me saying, “okay, I am not successful at relationships,” I had to accept that. That’s another thing that men do, men think they’re good with relationships and they say, “oh, it’s the woman,” or, “it’s 50/50, we both have problems.” No! I had to admit that I was not successful at relationships but I was good at other things. Professionally, I wasn’t going to loose and it wasn’t until I adopted the same attitude and applied it to my relationships that I became successful in my marriage.</p>
<p>Bossip: In your book, you talked about a situation where you were stringing two women along. The story was pretty funny, but, one of the women you were pretty serious about, right? We’ve all had that person who would have been a great match but the time wasn’t right. In your opinion, how important is timing?</p>
<p>Dixon: Mm. Well, I was emotionally unstable at the time. Cleo was her name and she shouldn’t have dated me, she knew who I was. There are too many women who know exactly where the man is, but they still continue to date him — he’s not going to change, he’s not going to be better. Women need to understand that a man is always going to do what’s best for him. You never have to tell a man to do what’s best for him or not to compromise this or sacrifice that because he’s not going to —</p>
<p>Bossip: That’s selfish. Are you saying that men are selfish by nature?</p>
<p>Dixon: Oh, absolutely! We are selfish by nature especially when to comes to relationships. We have to learn<a href="http://itunes.apple.com/us/album/men-dont-heal-we-ho-a-book/id415715171"><img class="alignright size-medium wp-image-896" title="Buy Now CD" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/Buy-Now-CD1-300x184.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="184" /></a> how to share and put other people first. Women kind of get that naturally, it’s nothing. It’s a motherly instinct and a natural inclination for women to want others to be happy. Women want their girlfriends to be happy! I get e-mails all the time from women about their girlfriends situations, I don’t get any e-mails from dudes about their homeboys … ever. We don’t care about each other like that to talk about those type of things. For women, it’s natural to put others before herself but for men it’s learned. I tell men all the time, when you’re in a relationship, there are certain things you have to do and a lot of men just don’t want to do them! Men have to be responsible! Men have to understand that you have to maintain your respect for your wife and she has to respect you! You can’t lose your respect. She doesn’t respect you and you have a problem because of the things that you do! You have to take responsibility for your actions. You’re running around making mistakes as if you’re single and still want her to respect you? For what? That’s not how manhood works. If she doesn’t respect you, then does not respect your manhood and she won’t follow your leadership.</p>
<p>Bossip: Wow, true!</p>
<p>Dixon: But let’s get back to women, though. What kills me about women is this: I talked to a woman yesterday who was dating a man who made very clear to her that he was separated from his wife, he wanted his wife back and if she were to call him today, he would go back to her. And her response was, “I don’t know what I’m going to do if you go back to your wife.” But a man would never accept that! If a woman told a man, “if my husband calls me today, I’m going back to him.” He would be like, “okay. I’ll holler at you another time,” or it would just be a sex thing.</p>
<p>Bossip: That’s crazy! But there are so many women out there who want to be in a relationship so badly, they’ll settle for that guy who’s still pining for his wife.</p>
<p>Dixon: It’s about the emotional bond that we all crave. In my book, I wrote about a woman I was dating and she was contemplating visiting her ex and I put forth my best effort to connect with her deeper, and she still went to visit her ex! I broke it off with her when she came back because no one can compete with the pre-existing emotions of a past relationship. You just can’t, there’s no way! You can’t really love more than one person, it’s very difficult to do that. For the most part, most people are only going to love one person, everybody else they like. That’s where a lot of women get caught up. If you’re dating a man that loves someone else, you’re going to be falling in love with him while his emotions are not developing because he’s in love with someone else. You’re free and clear emotionally and he’s not.</p>
<p>Bossip: Okay, hold up! A lot of women are jumping from relationship to relationship also! So a lot of times, they’re not emotionally free and clear either. The damage is done by both parties, really! Because, at the end of the day, no one wants to be alone.</p>
<p>Dixon: I feel like women are lowering their standards so far and the men aren’t even meeting that now. You can only lower you standards to a certain level. A man has to have some basic fundamental things that he brings to the table in order to be in a healthy relationship. If you’re in a relationship and he cheats on you three times, you can’t marry him! If you’re in a relationship with a guy and he still lives with his mama, you should know it’s not going to work. At least, date a man who wants to be in a relationship! You don’t date a man that you met in the club who tells you that he’s dating two women and he’s recently divorced. Why would you do that? You have to know that the guy you’re dating is datable, interested and available.</p>
<p>Bossip: But how do you know this when most men, as you say, are hoes?</p>
<p>Dixon: Men think women are hoes anyway. When a man meets a woman, we’re not looking at you as the mother of our children or the wife we’ve been dreaming about. We haven’t been dreaming about a wife! When we first meet a woman, what are we thinking about? Sex. Men don’t look at a woman and say, “wow, she looks really responsible. She is so fine, we would have a great relationship, a white picket fence, a dog and three kids.” No. We’re thinking about the night. You don’t have to give us your sex, that’s up to you. But what men do, is make a woman prove to us that she is woman and not a ho. We’re not going to just assume that she’s qualified to be in a relationship with us. A woman can decide if a man is worth investing in the first five minutes of meeting him. He hopped out the Benz, he has on a nice suit, he smells good, no ring and he’s a lawyer. And she’ll say, “Okay, he’ll make a great relationship partner.” A woman can jump out the same Benz, look just as good and is just a qualified but the man is not thinking about tomorrow at all, he’s thinking about tonight!</p>
<p>Bossip: Wow! Why?</p>
<p>Dixon: Because we’re not looking for no wife! Men are not running around looking for wives. You don’t really think that, do you? I’m not saying that we don’t want love, I’m saying we’re not looking for it. If we happen to find it, great! But that’s not what we’re looking for. Women walk around looking for love, looking for a relationship, looking for marriage. Men and women are completely opposite in terms of what we’re looking for when we meet. We don’t care what your credentials are when we meet you. We’re looking at how fine you are, how you look and how you smell, that’s it! We can’t tell from across the room how intelligent you are.</p>
<p>Bossip: Ugh! That is so primal! All men want is sex, then?</p>
<p>Dixon: Yes. But you don’t have to give it to us! The thrill is in the chase! Know what you’re doing and know what it is. Don’t think that because you have sex with him that you’re now an item or that you’re officially in a relationship. Don’t think your relationship has advanced any farther just because you had sex.</p>
<p>Bossip: Okay, Mr. Dixon! We’re running out of time here … any closing thoughts?</p>
<p><a href="mailto:StevenJamesDixon@RelationshipBeast.com"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-1381" title="RB_ADD" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/RB_ADD-300x272.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="272" /></a>Dixon: I’m not saying any of this to discourage women. I’m saying, understand what you’re dealing with. Know that, yes, we want sex, get over that … and understand that you’re in control of your sex. It’s okay that a man wants you and wants to bed you but you have to teach him how to treat you. I’m writing a book now about how we have to teach each other how to treat each other. In the meantime though, get the book!</p>
<p>Bossip: Thank you, Mr. Dixon! Your time and candor is much appreciated!</p>
<p>Dixon: Thank you!</p>
<p>Okay, Bossip fam! This a really good read, if you want the raw, uncut truth about how a man’s mind works, get the book!</p>
<p>&#8211;</p>
<p id="yui_3_2_0_5_1312821616325143"><a id="yui_3_2_0_5_1312821616325139" href="http://www.twitter.com/StevenJDixon" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Twitter.com/StevenJDixon</a></p>
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		<title>Q and A with Bossip.com Part II</title>
		<link>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/q-and-a-with-bossip-com-part-ii</link>
		<comments>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/q-and-a-with-bossip-com-part-ii#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 19 Sep 2011 17:09:51 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Steven James Dixon</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Q & A with The Relationship Beast]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stevenjamesdixon.com/?p=1436</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Good day, Bossip fam! As promised, we are re-introducing you to Steven James Dixon, author of the book, “Men Don’t Heal We Ho,” a Book About the Emotional Instability of Men. After receiving and reading the book, we had to talk to him as we learned he had scripted his experiences with women and marriage ]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/Steven-Daper-21.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-1686" title="Steven Daper 2" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/Steven-Daper-21-300x171.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="171" /></a>Good day, Bossip fam! As promised, we are re-introducing you to Steven James Dixon, author of the book, “Men Don’t Heal We Ho,” a Book About the Emotional Instability of Men. After receiving and reading the book, we had to talk to him as we learned he had scripted his experiences with women and marriage and sent it to the press. With chapters that will resonate in the depths of your psyche, Dixon leaves no room for question in this in-depth chronicle of his personal struggles with being a husband after unapologetically “ho”ing. His message is true and the best part, perhaps, is his willingness to share his thoughts and emotions with raw honesty. We had the chance to explore Dixon’s thought process and it’s reminiscent of long chats with an older brother who will never steer you in the wrong direction. No questions go unanswered without brutal candor that cannot be argued – it’s no wonder people would seek the ‘Relationship Beast’s’ opinion. It’s foolproof and simple enough to apply to your love life. Many topics are worthy of discussion, so, please take a look and share your thoughts below! To read the first part of our interview with Mr. Dixon, click here!</p>
<p>Bossip: To pick up where we left off there’s an excerpt from your book that we’d like for you to explain.</p>
<p>“They have put themselves in a competition they can’t win because I don’t want any of them to win! I hate of them. All of them will lose, because I lost.” –Men Don’t Heal, We Ho</p>
<p>Dixon: Right.</p>
<p>Bossip:You said that, at a certain point in your life, you were angry and at women. Can you explain your sentiment, please?</p>
<p>Dixon: All women, I felt, were hoes. Those feelings derived from my disappointment, my frustration and my emotional instability. I just felt like all women were no good, they were out to get me and I had to get them first … that was really based on me being hurt. I was in a place where I said, “I can’t let them hurt me again, so, I’ll never open myself up to be hurt again and whatever I do to them is whatever.”</p>
<p>Bossip: It seems like a lot of men who are hurt by that one woman are scarred! Do you think this attributes to the lack of aspiration to get married or be settled in a sturdy relationship? Seems like dating is a forever game now …</p>
<p>Dixon: Dating is ruining a lot of our relationships and marriages. When we’re dating, we don’t build. I’ll<a href="http://itunes.apple.com/us/album/men-dont-heal-we-ho-a-book/id415715171"><img class="alignright size-medium wp-image-896" title="Buy Now CD" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/Buy-Now-CD1-300x184.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="184" /></a> explain. When we’re dating and we get upset, we leave. So when we’re married and we get upset, we can’t leave. When you’re married and can’t leave what happens? Folks go complaining to their single friends saying, “hey, don’t get married. It’s too much. Stay single forever.” But, marriage isn’t the problem, it’s an institution created by God. The problem is, we don’t develop problem solving skills and so people are stuck in unhappy marriages. I teach people how to solve their problems! And so I tell people, “come on, you have a problem and you can fix it.”</p>
<p>Bossip: Okay, so dating is the problem? You do have to date in order to secure a marriage, so what do you suggest as a healthy method to choosing a partner for marriage?</p>
<p>Dixon: Well, I’m not saying that you shouldn’t date, I’m saying dating shouldn’t have the negative affect that it has on marriage that it does today. Our priorities have shifted which is good and bad. For example, we are running around trying to be the best doctor, the best lawyer, the best rapper and have no inclination to want to be the best husband. That is not the goal for so many men … and women. How many people have you heard say, “I’m good at everything I do except for marriage or being a good boyfriend or girlfriend.” That was me! That was my way of thinking and I had to change that!</p>
<p>Bossip: Well, love and relationships are just as simple as they are complex, right? So, was it an easy turnaround for you?</p>
<p>Dixon: The reason why I was good at everything else except for marriage is because I didn’t apply the same principles or pour the same energy into my personal relationships as I did my professional ones. Like, you for example, you’ll stay up until four in the morning to research or write an article but would you stay up until four in the morning trying to figure out how to be a better wife? Too often, in marriages, I run into people who are treating their spouse as good as they feel they deserve on that day. What, because you’re mad at your spouse, you’re not going to cook dinner? That’s not okay. If you’re committed to being the best husband or wife, your spouse shouldn’t have to earn good treatment.</p>
<p>Bossip: This is true! Do you get these sort of complaints from men mostly? Or women too?</p>
<p>Dixon: Women, easily. I think it’s because they’re more frustrated. Men only come around and want to talk when they’re really trying to save their relationship or marriage. And I always refer back to my principle, a relationship is successful or fails based upon the leadership of the man. If you are a good leader and if you are a good husband, she will be a good wife! Men don’t like it when I say that and they get mad but I tell them, “you go be a good husband and watch what happens.”</p>
<p>Bossip: Have you had any testimonials from men, so far?</p>
<p>Dixon: Men have always came back to me and said that they agreed one-hundred percent but the problem was getting their woman on board because, sometimes, they have done so much wrong. So, then it goes back to the woman – when you say you’re going to marry a man you’re saying that you’re willing to forgive him for the mistakes he’s made. I tell women all the time, “hey, if this guy is coming to you, apologized and wants to get help and you believe that he’s going to put forth an effort, then you’re committing to trying.”</p>
<p>Bossip: Do you think women “commit to trying” too soon?</p>
<p>Dixon: Yes, women act like they’re married when they’re dating. I tell women, “whatever you let a man do to you while you’re single is your fault.” A man has to prove, through his actions, that he’s ready to be in a serious relationship versus telling you what you want to hear. Women don’t understand that we are trained to tell y’all what you want to hear.</p>
<p>Bossip: Wow, that’s impossible to argue. But why tell women what they want to hear instead of the truth?</p>
<p>Dixon: Men have a very, very difficult time telling a woman, “I don’t want to see you anymore.”</p>
<p>Bossip: Oh, please! Why? This hardly seems to be the case in this day and age.</p>
<p>Dixon: Because why would we give up good sex?</p>
<p>Bossip: Because there’s plenty more out there! This is the Facebook, text message, digital era! There’s plenty more “good sex” out there to be had and it’s, literally, at your fingertips!</p>
<p>Dixon: Well, now that’s true! And I’m just going to keep it real, ladies should never, ever send naked pictures of herself to a man because he’s going to show it to all of his friends.</p>
<p>Bossip: That’s so uncool on so many levels!</p>
<p><a href="mailto:StevenJamesDixon@RelationshipBeast.com"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-1381" title="RB_ADD" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/RB_ADD-300x272.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="272" /></a>Dixon: It is! What’s happening is, men are advancing faster than women at “the game.” It’s mainly because we want two different things. Women can’t advance as fast as we can because you want relationships and long-term stability. We want sex. Our goal and what we’re trying to get is a lot easier to map out even if it means lying to you. “Yeah, I love you. Yeah. I’m going to call you, I am. I promise.” You tell us what you want and you tell us what you need but you don’t make us prove those things you just allow us to claim or say to you that we feel like that about you. Once we do that, you open up and give us all that you have to offer and we don’t want anything from you but your sex. That is why women have to define their own value instead of leaving that up to man.</p>
<p>Bossip: So, are you an advocate of celibacy until marriage?</p>
<p>Dixon: No. I’m not telling women not to have sex, that’s between her and God. I’m biblical an all, but it’s unrealistic to tell someone not to have sex. But I have to say this, women have got to practice safe-sex, religiously! Men would never do that! All men are in agreement that we don’t know why women do that. Why do women allow men to have unprotected sex with them? Do you think a man would have unprotected sex with a woman if he could get pregnant? He would never take that chance! Have our bodies all jacked up a what not, we’re not doing that. Woman aren’t getting the fact that men have the ability to physically get up and walk away.</p>
<p>Bossip: Is this a part of the thought process when men make reckless decisions?</p>
<p>Dixon: You know what? A man doesn’t have an emotional connection with a child until it is born. Women have nine months of intimacy with the unborn baby and when the child is birthed, she’s in love already. Baby daddy’s connection doesn’t start until the birth, while Mom has a nine month advantage over him. You spent every day of that nine months with the child and now you have a situation where you’re not living with the father and he’s not there 24 hours a day, seven- days-a-week. So, if you decide to go your own separate ways, the bond is not there between the man and that child to keep him there – to bring him home. Too many men don’t develop that bond and that’s not always the man’s fault. But the bottom line is, we have to stop having babies out of wedlock.</p>
<p>Bossip: Since we’re on the subject, what about single moms? Any dating pointers for them?</p>
<p>Dixon: I just wrote an article about women getting pregnant. Now, when you’re a single woman and you get pregnant for a man that’s unstable, you lose at least three years of your life. You lose a year being pregnant and trying to salvage the relationship. Then, the second year you sit around trying to figure out if you all are going to make it. Year three, he’s with someone else and you’re like, “wow, he’s with someone else, I can’t believe we’re not going to be together.” So, finally, in the fourth year, you say “okay, I gotta move on.” A lot of women go through this. You’re wasting you’re life! When you acknowledge that a man doesn’t want to be with you, you have to move on. Move on! And, I’m not saying move on to another man but move on away from him. That’s why I tell women all the time, “you gotta do you.” A woman has to do her all the time! Men do them all day, easy. You never have to tell a man to “do you” because he already is, know that.</p>
<p>Ladies and Gents, does Dixon live up to his moniker, “The Relationship Beast?” Please share your thoughts below!</p>
<p>&#8211;</p>
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		<title>Q and A with Bossip.com Part I</title>
		<link>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/q-and-a-with-bossip-com-part-i</link>
		<comments>http://stevenjamesdixon.com/q-and-a-with-bossip-com-part-i#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 19 Sep 2011 16:34:08 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Steven James Dixon</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Q & A with The Relationship Beast]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stevenjamesdixon.com/?p=1434</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Good day, Bossip fam! Meet Steven James Dixon, author of the book, “Men Don’t Heal, We Ho” a Book About the Emotional Instability of Men. After receiving and reading the book, we had to talk to him as we learned he had scripted his experiences with women and marriage and sent it to the press. ]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/Steven-Daper-1.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-1688" title="Steven Daper 1" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/Steven-Daper-1-300x171.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="171" /></a>Good day, Bossip fam! Meet Steven James Dixon, author of the book, “Men Don’t Heal, We Ho” a Book About the Emotional Instability of Men. After receiving and reading the book, we had to talk to him as we learned he had scripted his experiences with women and marriage and sent it to the press. With chapters that will resonate somewhere in your love-craving psyche, Dixon leaves no room for question in this in-depth chronicle of his personal struggles with being a husband after unapologetically “ho”ing. His message is true and the best part, perhaps, is his willingness to share his thoughts and emotions with raw honesty. We had the chance to explore Dixon’s thought process and it’s reminiscent of long chats with an older brother who will never steer you in the wrong direction. No questions go unanswered without brutal candor that cannot be argued – it’s no wonder people would seek the ‘Relationship Beast’s’ opinion. It’s foolproof and simple enough to apply to your love life — you can file this read under “self help.” Many topics are worthy of discussion, so, please take a look and share your thoughts below!</p>
<p>Bossip: Mr. Dixon, could you brief the readers on the experience that led you to write the book, “Men Don’t Heal, We Ho” and how you got the name ‘The Relationship Beast.’</p>
<p>Dixon: Sure! Well, I got married the first time at the age of 23 and got divorced at 25. Then, I got engaged again and broke that off. I got married to the woman I’m married to now and almost got another divorce until I finally figured out that I didn&#8217;t know what I was doing! I had no idea what I was doing, period. I mean, my thoughts were “I’m just married, I don’t know what to do.” I wanted to be married and I value and appreciate for family but, again, I didn&#8217;t know what I was doing. I looked around at the people closest to me and didn’t like their position – my mother was divorced three times and my father was divorced three times also. I had to figure it out and I had to share it so I decided to write a book. Well, once I wrote the book people started to reach out to me. I never presented myself as a marriage counselor or coach, I just wrote a book! People would say, “hey, I like the way you think. What do you think about my situation?”</p>
<p>Bossip: How would you encourage a husband or wife to admit that he or she may not know what they’re doing?</p>
<p>Dixon: My principle is, that all relationships are successful or they fail based upon the leadership of men. That’s what saved my marriage and I have been debating that with men all over the country but they don’t want to accept that. If you follow the bible, then you know that the man has a responsibility to be what God put him here on earth for, and that’s to be leaders. If the marriage fails, then it’s the man’s fault and he was irresponsible. It’s all fairly simple, though. Divorce cannot be an option when you’re married. As long as you’re thinking that a divorce is the quick fix, then you’ll never solve the problems within your marriage.</p>
<p>Bossip: Wow, that’s something to chew on.</p>
<p>Dixon: Think about it. When Eve was eating on the fruit, God knew what was going on but he didn&#8217;t go to Eve<a href="http://itunes.apple.com/us/album/men-dont-heal-we-ho-a-book/id415715171"><img class="alignright size-medium wp-image-896" title="Buy Now CD" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/Buy-Now-CD1-300x184.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="184" /></a> and say, “Eve, what you doing?” He looked at Adam which means that Adam was responsible for Eve. So, I tell men, “hey, be a good husband, that’s what you do. Stop worrying about what she’s doing. Stop complaining about what she’s doing, you be a good husband. You make sacrifices. You lead your family and she will follow. It’s natural for her to do this when you are leading properly.” If a man is constantly saying things like, “well, she did this and she did that,” then that means she has a problem with your leadership.</p>
<p>Bossip: In theory, your thought process is amazing. Realistically, however, there are a large number of people who are in unhappy relationships and marriages and we can’t blame men only, right?</p>
<p>Dixon: When you move from dating into serious relationships or marriages, you have to know what you’re looking for and what your value is. Most men don’t know what they want. Once you acknowledge or find out that a man does not know what he wants in terms of a wife and marriage, then you have to leave and women aren’t doing that. But you also have to understand this about men, if we’re having sex then we’re good! It’s what we want to do by nature! We’re not running around trying to find wives if we’re sexually content.</p>
<p>Bossip: Wow, it’s that simple? So, what would entice a man to actively seek a stable relationship or marriage if he can get sex from several women whenever he wants it?</p>
<p>Dixon: That’s a problem. That’s definitely a problem and probably the subject of my next book. Men need to have clear categories of women and there’s three – you’re either a hoe, a girlfriend or a wife and there’s too many woman that are hoes who think they’re girlfriends. Too many women that will never be wives. When a man meets a woman for the first time, the one thing he’s thinking about is if he’s going to “get some” and a woman has to prove that she’s more than that. That’s when he’ll start respecting you, that’s when he’ll start to think about growing and developing a relationship. Women, a lot of times, make the mistake of dating the wrong men at the wrong time.</p>
<p>Bossip: In your opinion, how would a woman gauge a man’s seriousness? How would she know if the timing is wrong?</p>
<p>Dixon: I tell women all the time, make smarter choices. For example, if you meet a man on Friday that just moved to your city a week ago, would you date him? No. Why? Because, he’s going to meet another woman on Saturday, Sunday … an all next week for that matter. Don’t date him. What about the athlete that just signed a multi-million dollar contract with a professional team? Don’t date him either! If you see Usher in the club and he’s hollering at you, have a good time and just know that he’s not calling you tomorrow. Why? Because he just got a divorce! When you run into the guy that just bought a new house, don’t date that guy! He’s trying to get as many women as can into that new house! Women should just know that! Doesn’t it make sense?</p>
<p>Bossip: Okay, let’s circle back to the divorce scenario, please. How long do you think should people wait before dating someone who’s been divorced or in a long term relationship?</p>
<p>Dixon: I believe that you should wait at least a year before you date someone who’s divorced or been in a long term relationship. Don’t ever date a man or woman who’s been divorced or broken up for less than a year. Then, you have to explore how it ended — based on how that relationship ended is how they may start or behave in a new one.</p>
<p>Bossip: Come on, now! There’s two sides to every story and you’re never going to get the whole truth about why and how things ended!</p>
<p><a href="mailto:StevenJamesDixon@RelationshipBeast.com"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-1381" title="RB_ADD" src="http://stevenjamesdixon.com/nicheonline/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/RB_ADD-300x272.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="272" /></a>Dixon: You’ll get some of it and of you don’t get enough information to work with, then you have to move on. You have to protect yourself, right? You have to get your questions answers or you can’t date him! If you meet a man who tells you that his wife cheated on him with is best friend, then you should already know that he’ll be no good in the next relationship, move on. You have to remember, relationships are decisions, you don’t just fall into them, you make them. You can’t just roll the dice and hope he’s a good guy!</p>
<p>Bossip: That’s very true!</p>
<p>Dixon: You have to understand that dating is a game! You have to recognize that some of these guys are good and some are bad. You have to weed yourself through the trash. Understand that the guy you meet might be trash and may not be worth your time – you have to have that understanding when you meet him. Dating is an introductory phase — an interviewing process for a full time position, not every candidate will make the cut, some will be fired! A principle I believe women should follow is this, date more and leave earlier. That’s doesn&#8217;t mean sleep around, but get out there and date more … mingle around.</p>
<p>Bossip: If a woman dates more and leaves earlier, how does she keep herself from the perpetual cycle of dating with no end result, i.e. the long term relationship or marriage?</p>
<p>Dixon: There’s definitely a balance that’s needed. Right now, we’ll leave immediately or we’ll stay far too long, you know? Once you have done all you can to maintain and grow the relationship and you’re still not getting what you want from it, move on. But how you leave it is key. You have to be civil and say, “hey, I can see you’re not serious about being in a serious relationship and that’s fine but I can’t continue to invest in it. Come holler at me when you’re serious.” If you stay too long and leave cussing him out, then it’s over – the door is no longer open. So, leave before it gets to that point.</p>
<p>Ladies and Gents, does Dixon live up to his moniker, The Relationship Beast?</p>
<p>&#8211;</p>
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