The Relationship Report – “You Need To Get A Divorce”

Steven James Dixon September 12, 2011 0

The average man and woman will not be successful at marriage. The institution of marriage is the most difficult institution to graduate from. In an institution, average is a score of 75%. The divorce rate is 50% so that means that from 1% to 50% of marriages are bad. From 51% to 75% of marriages are average. That 51% to 75% of marriages consist of the average man and the average woman. This means two things:

1.  In order to be happily married, you will need to be an above average spouse and you will need to marry an above average spouse.

2.  Three out of four married couples need to get a divorce. You are making the institution of marriage look bad. There is nothing wrong with the institution of marriage there is something wrong with husband and/or there is something wrong with the wife. Being an average spouse is not working for marriage. Average is good for the single life. Go do that.

I am sick of people talking about marriage as if they are unhappy simply because they formed a legal union. All you did was sign your name on the dotted line. The institution of marriage has done you no harm. It is nerve racking to consistently hear people say “all of the married people are unhappy.” I am disgusted by the people who get a divorce and then say that they will never marry again. Marriage did not fail you, you failed at marriage. Let me be clear on my stance on the new found craze called “Open Marriage.” The people who started that crap are going to hell. An Open Marriage is called “Dating.” Keep your boyfriend or girlfriend title and don’t get married. Don’t do us any favors. Our fraternity of happily married folks reject your submission of membership. It is people like you who are making the institution of marriage look bad. Get a divorce. Go womanize or sleep with multiple men.

I heard Pastor Sean Wilburn in Houston,TX say that marriage is Grown Folks business. Being grown is about being responsible. There is no higher responsibility than living up to your title of Husband or Wife. There is no greater title. There are too many people that pursued and acquired the title, Husband or Wife and now that they got the title they think that other titles are more important. There are too many people trying to be the best doctors, lawyers, rappers and actors and not enough people trying to be the best Husband or be the best Wife. Look here, if you are not willing to put everything that you have into your marriage then you need to get a divorce. Like today! GET OUT OF OUR INSTITUTION! WE DON’T WANT YOU IN OUR FRATERNITY! Get a divorce. Go be average in some other part of your life. Go be like everyone else who quit, gave up and got a divorce. Once we get you divorced and get the divorce rate up to 75% then and only then will marriage be restored as a loving union that people are envious of. Then and only then will people be able to look at the rest of the marriages that are remaining and say to themselves “In order for me to be happily married I am going to have to love as hard as that couple is loving.”

There are too many people married. It’s going to take awhile for everyone to get a divorce that needs to but I want you guys to go ahead and start the paperwork immediately. If you don’t want to show initiative, which is probably one of the reasons why you need to get a divorce, check back on every week for the Divorce List.

Divorce List – List of people who need to get a divorce. I am compiling the list as we speak. If three or more of your family and/or friends say that you need to get a divorce, your name will be added to the Divorce List. This is your last warning. GET OUT OF OUR INSTITUTION BEFORE WE PUT YOU ON BLAST!

Divorce List for the week of September 19, 2011

  1. Keyshawnn & Toelesha Thomas in Shreveport, LA – Toelesha your mother Emma, your father Odell and your niece Sheilta recommended you guys file for a divorce.
  2. Vondrizzy & Fashalonda Johnson in Freeport, NY – Vondre Sr. said that if he was you, he would get a divorce. Kevinna, your mother said that you were stupid to marry Vondre in the beginning and she told you that. Your son needs counseling. He said that both of y’all are cheating right now.
  3. J-Lynn & JayLynnda Smith in Los Angeles, CA- Based on your names alone, you guys should have known that your marriage was not going to last. JayLynnda both your father Jay and your mother Lynnda said, “This is exactly why we didn’t come to the wedding.” J-Lynn your homeboy DeeJay said that JayLynnda was initially his girl at first and you stole her. Additionally he said that your first born is really not your first born. He said that your second born is your first born.
  4. Uncle Robert & Aunt Mary – What you guys did at the family reunion last week was an embarrassment. Uncle Robert, how are you going to bring your girlfriend to the family reunion? Aunt Mary, you did not have pull that lady’s weave off. You guys need to get a divorce.

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